Friday, May 3, 2013

The Day My Dog Made Me Cry

I just want to warn you, this post talks about puke and diarrhea. Sorry.


So it's a Friday.

Gracie whines to get out of her kennel at the crack of dawn. I'm talking 5:00am. Not ok.

I let her outside. She goes pee and hops back inside. I put her back in her kennel, which is located in our room.

She starts whining again. Not uncommon for this to last about 5 minutes. We are trying to train her that whining does not get her what she wants. Good parents right?

So after about 20 minutes of that I get SICK AND TIRED of her crying. I take her kennel and put it in the guest room. 

15 more minutes of whining. Then 30. Then 45. Then 2 hours. 

2 HOURS OF CONSTANT CRYING! What is wrong with her!? 

I finally drag myself out of bed, annoyed that she "won the war" by getting what she wants. 

I open the door to the guest room.....


My stomach immediately drops. I can't believe I left her in her poopy kennel for 2 hours. "I AM THE WORST PARENT!!!"

In our defense, she has never done anything like this in the past, so it was hard to predict that something was actually wrong. It's like the little boy who cried wolf. She is the little boy.

Anyway, I carefully pull her poopy-covered-self out of her kennel, making sure to keep her at an arm's distance. 

Me: "TRENT!!!! Gracie pooped all over herself!!!"
Trent: "What!? She did what!?"

We take her to the tub and wash her well. She has a guilty look on her face, which I can still picture in my head. "Don't be sorry Gracie Belle! It's mommy's fault! I didn't know you really had to go!"

Little did we know, that look on her face meant something very different...

It was actually a look of "You are going to hate me after what I am about to do to your carpets.

We towel dried her and she ran around the house for a few minutes, sprinting like a mad woman, which she always does. 

Suddenly I see her stop at the end of the hallway. 

We make eye contact.

She squats. I know exactly what that means. "NOOO! Don't poop on my carpet!!"

I run over there and she has just let it rip! 100% liquid is coming out of her butt right now. 

Normally I would pick her up and run her outside. I quickly make the decision to not move her. If I move her there will be a stream of poop all the way downstairs and out the side door. 

So I just have to sit there and watch her. Watch her diarrhea all over my carpet. At that point I kind of wanted to cry, but I didn't. She was obviously sick so I couldn't be mad.

I put her outside while I spend the next 20 minutes cleaning up the spot. Yuck yuck yuck. 

Trent brings her back inside before he has to leave for work because she is wet and it's freezing outside. 

She skips around like she isn't sick anymore. I pull her kennel into the bathroom to hose down, holding my breath otherwise I might puke. 

I opened it up and there was poop smeared on all sides of that kennel. I just don't understand. She was apparently doing summersaults in there!!

So that was the worst. It's finally clean and drying and things start to settle down.

WRONG! I go downstairs and Gracie pukes ALL OVER the hardwood floor. I get over there and see that she has eaten a bouquet of fake flowers. SERIOUSLY!?


So I clean that up. For the next few hours she appears to be better, which is great because Trent and I have to go to Kansas City for my grandmother's funeral. Sad, I know.

I go to the mud room to take out our trash. I pick up the trash bag and see that Gracie has graciously peed ALL OVER the floor the trash bag was sitting on. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? 

She very rarely has accidents anymore. I have no idea when she would have done that. Regardless, it absolutely disgusted me and I spent an hour cleaning the whole mudroom and mopping the floors.

Gracie acts like everything is perfectly fine, playing with toys and running around. I'm hoping that her diarrhea episode is over.  

Well, I was wrong.

She diarrheas again all over my new rug :-( This is a bubble wool rug (mentioned in this post). It is not easy to clean.

I spend FOREVER cleaning it. I let Gracie back inside the house because, again, it is freezing outside, and she acts as if she is done out there.

You know what she does? DIARRHEAS AGAIN!!

At this point I am exhausted. I bathed her, cleaned her kennel, cleaned her puke, cleaned her pee and cleaned her diarrhea twice.

I grab the carpet cleaner and head over to the spot. Midway there, the cleaner top falls off of the bottle and spills EVERYWHERE! 

The entire bottle. All over my hardwood floor. 

Trent comes home a few minutes later to me crying on the floor, wiping up the cleaner with paper towels.

It was probably the worst day I can recall in a very long time. I spent 9/10ths of my day cleaning up bodily functions from my dog. 

So I just cried about it. Trent held me and I calmed down. Gracie didn't puke, pee or poop in the house again, which was nice. And then we left for my grandmother's funeral. 

The end.


  1. We just got a new puppy I can totally relate to that "I can't take much more" feeling! I saw a quote on a puppy training blog that still makes me laugh. It quoted Charles Dickens "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times" then said (he must have had a puppy). So true :)

    1. HAHA! It was definitely the worst of times. Hopefully some day I will look back and think "Ya, it was the best of times too!" :-)


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